恩典之路

白敏慈神父 Marciano Baptista da Silva, S.J.

入會60年

1941-04-24 生於中國廣東沙面Born in Shamian, Canton, China.   
1961-09-07 在香港進入耶穌會Entered the Society of Jesus in Hong Kong.
1975-08-30 在香港領受鐸品Ordained Priest in Hong Kong, by Msgr. John B. Wu.
1979-02-02 在舊金山矢發末願Final Vows in San Francisco, USA.

現任聖神修院神哲學院、香港天主教聖經學院聖經與神學教授At Holy Spirit Seminary College and Hong Kong Catholic Biblical Institute, Professor Sacred Scripture and Theology, Chaplain to Hong Kong University of Science & Technology.

我的聖召

我的出生
在1941年4月24日（四），我出生於廣州沙面。我家人是華裔、葡萄牙和馬來西亞混血的澳門人，家母姓Da Silva，家父姓Baptista。我有十個手足（七個姐妹和三個哥哥），而我是男孩中最年幼的。1941年5月5日（一）時，我在教區領洗。因為發生戰事，在我出生六個月後搬至澳門，當時是葡萄牙統治下的中立領土，我在那裡住到1946年。

之後我們舉家移居香港。我的父母都非常虔誠，我們幾乎天天念玫瑰經和許多禱文。在我6歲那年，我的母親過世了，當時她才46歲，這件事對我父親的打擊非常大。從那時起，我的幾位姐姐和來自中國內地的保母就來照顧我和較年幼的妹妹。接著我開始上學，先在九龍的瑪利諾修院學校就學兩年，再到男子中學的喇沙書院（La Salle）就讀到1961年畢業。我的父親和手足都為我的課業祈禱，手足當中有三位已經結婚，而其他人都已進入職場。

聖召的初始
我發現自己的聖召使命就在此時，在我13歲的時，遇見當時聆聽我告解的神父，他令我很景仰，讓我想追隨他的腳步；但我並不知道他是位耶穌會士。在喇沙書院有另一位也察覺自己天命的同學（雖然他最終成為醫師而未投入司祭職），他知道我對那位神父的崇敬，便把我介紹給耶穌會士。我景仰的那位神父名叫蘇惠民（Fr. Edmund Sullivan, S.J.），他在聖德肋撒堂聽告解；蘇神父非常富有同情心且很關心窮人，十分受人歡迎，向他告解的人總是大排長龍。可惜在我加入耶穌會的那年，他去了吉隆坡，在很多年後我才在見到他。

1961年4月，我接受了耶穌會的初試。1961年9月7日(四)，我在居住了兩年又兩個月的長沙進入耶穌會；我的初學同伴們來自新加坡、馬來西亞和北京神學院，還有比我們年長一歲的徐志忠（George Zee）和一位較年輕的廣州弟兄，最後剩下我和徐志忠留在修會。

修會的培育
在初學結束後，我被派往澳洲。當時的選擇是：如果我有資格進入Commonwealth University，畢業後便可在華仁書院任教；或者可先到菲律賓，再回到香港，如此也是可以當任老師。我在澳洲的大學研修3年哲學及4年化學，病了一年，康復後就畢業了。在1970年12月回到香港，我想與德蕾莎修女一起共事，但神長不同意我離開中華省，所以他們將我和一樣幫助窮人的陸毅神父（Fr. Luis Ruiz）一同派往至澳門。我在利瑪竇中學教授英文和化學兩年，也學了一些廣東話。1972年我回到香港神學院進修神學，於1975年在九龍華仁書院晉鐸，並於1976年取得學士學位；同年，我在新亞書院學習了一年的廣東話。1977年，我在科羅拉多州與來自世界各地的14名耶穌會士一同參加第三年的卒試，而後到美國柏克萊（Berkeley）神學院主修聖經並取得神學碩士；1979年2月2日(五)，我在那裡矢發末願。

使命工作的展開
我在香港華仁書院任教10年，從1983年至1988年被任命為校長，由於需要教育學位，1983年我在澳洲待了10個月獲取學位。因嘉理陵神父（Fr. Ó Cearbhalláin）於1987年中風，我也替他在教區的聖神修院代課一陣子。我擔任香港華仁書院的校長直到我的健康狀況惡化才卸下職務。1988年我去利瑪竇宿舍擔任副舍監，與120名學生住在一起，全年無休，因此與他們關係的很好。

1992年，長上派我至澳洲，我經歷第二次的視網膜剝離，視力受到影響，甚至後來右眼完全失明。隔一年的3月我便回到九龍華仁書院，那裡不需要爬樓梯上上下下，能待在同一層樓。1987年開始我專任於聖神修院，教授神學，以新約為主。我也在拔萃男書院（Diocesan school）教聖詠團的學生拉丁文；而且自從我開始學習芳療，我便為整個教區調製聖油。

耶穌會在培育、靈修和教育方面讓我收穫很多。團體生活更是一種祝福！神操對我而言是一份禮物，有助於自我反省、心靈探索和邏輯發展，在很多方面是創新的方式；與其他會士的情誼也非常重要，有時靈感太深，很難將其分辨。基於耶穌會大會第32屆的主題：對信仰的服務和正義的提倡，我試著去扶助貧民。我認為將口號掛在嘴邊但沒有實際在生活中實行，這會是一個問題：在耶穌會大會之後，正義有更多地被彰顯嗎？確實有些人，像是Mark Raper神父非常關心難民議題，但耶穌會的其他成員呢？

最近的問題則是：是否有可能找到簡單的方法去實施四個普世性使徒優先？

我們擅於製作大量的理論文件，但我感覺我們宣示的意味大於實際的行動，這並不是意味著我們什麼都不做，我只是想向年輕世代拋出反思的問題。小心注意，請記住，在我們的《會憲》（Constitutions）中寫到，當我們接近死亡時，要將更多榮耀歸給天主：「在你的一生中，甚至在你去世時也是如此，耶穌會的每個成員都應該要誠摯地榮耀主，如此這樣，至少附近的鄰人也可以感受到我們在現世生死間信仰主的堅毅、耐心與愛啟發。」（第595條）而且為了避免像過去一樣的狀況，我們的創辦人聖依納爵未受到傅油聖事就逝世，長上們有責任確保每個人接收到最後的聖事!

我看見很多好事正在發生：儘管與平信徒的合作速度很慢，但我們現在正在改進，例如香港思維靜院的團隊或是華仁書院。還有一件讓我引以為傲的事，是在我們的學校充分給予學生自由（當時我在香港教書的經驗），對我們而言是很獨特的。他們將學會如何思考、並善用他們的自由，這也代表我們對他們的信任，而且他們也很珍惜這點。

最後，我記得在1974年的6月，我在菲律賓和Parisi神父一同避靜。當時我有種強烈的感覺指引我接受聖召。我很感激能加入耶穌會，不知不覺我也80歲了，感恩與驚奇油然而生：我竟已在耶穌會60年了！
 

Fr. Marciano Baptista SJ

My Vocation

I was born in Shameen, Canton, on Thursday, April 24, 1941. My family was Macanese (a mix of Chinese, Portuguese, and Malaysian blood): my mother's family name was Da Silva, and my father’s Baptista. I had ten siblings (seven sisters and three brothers) and I was the youngest one. I was baptized in my parish on Monday, May 5, 1941. Due to the beginning of the war, six months after my birth we moved to Macau, a neutral territory under Portuguese rule. We lived there until 1946.

Then, the whole family moved to Hong Kong. As a family, we said the Rosary almost everyday. Many litanies. My father and my mother were devout. I spent one year with my mother until her death when she was just 46 years old, and I was 6. Her sudden death was a great shock for my father. Since then, my seven sisters and a few nannies from Mainland China have taken care of me and of my youngest sister. Then I started to go to school: I had class for two years at the Maryknoll Convent in Kowloon (a school for boys and girls), and then at La Salle (for boys only) until 1961, when I got my secondary school graduation. My father and my siblings were paying for my education. Three of my siblings were already married and all the others were working.

At the same time, I discovered my vocation: at the age of 13 I already had a regular confessor, and since I admired him, I thought that maybe I could follow him. But I didn’t realize he was a Jesuit. It was another La Salle boy who was also discerning his own vocation (but finally didn’t join the priesthood, instead he became a doctor) who introduced me to the Jesuits. He knew about my admiration for the priest I just mentioned, my confessor at St Theresa Church, whose name was Fr. Edmund Sulllivan SJ. Fr. Edmund was very full of compassion, in the church there was always a long line to go to confession with him. He was very popular and very caring for the poor. He left for Kuala Lumpur the year I entered the Society. I met him only once many years later.

In April 1961 I had my first interview with the Society of Jesus. On Thursday, September 7, 1961, I joined the Society in Cheung Chau (where I lived for two years and two  months). My fellow novices were from Singapore, Malaysia, a former seminarian from Beijing, George Zee (who was one year senior) and another young fellow from Canton. I and George remained in the Society.

After the novitiate I was sent to Australia. The choice was: if you qualified for Commonwealth University you could teach at Wah Yan. Otherwise you could go to the Philippines and when back to Hong Kong you could also become a teacher. I stayed in Australia for seven years, three years of philosophy and four years of chemistry at the University. I got sick for one year and then I recovered and graduated. In December 1970, I came back to Hong Kong and I wanted to work with Mother Theresa, but my superiors didn’t agree I could leave the province, so they sent me to Macau with Fr. Luis Ruiz who was doing the same work for the poor. I stayed there for two years, teaching English and chemistry (and I learned some Cantonese) in the High School at the old Colegio Ricci. And later, in 1972, I came back to Hong Kong to study theology in the Seminary. I was ordained in 1975 in our chapel at Wah Yan Kowloon and I got my Bachelor's degree in 1976.

In 1976 I did a year of Cantonese language studies at New Asia College. I went to the tertianship program in Colorado in 1977 with 14 Jesuits from all over the world. And then I went to Berkeley for a general master in Theology, mainly in Scripture. I did my final vows in Berkeley, on Friday, February 2, 1979.

I started teaching at Wah Yan Hong Kong and I did it for ten years (since I was later appointed principal of the school, from 1983 to 88, in 1983 I needed a degree in education in Australia, where I was for ten months). I had also taught at the diocesan seminary (Holy Spirit) because Fr. Ó Cearbhalláin in 1987 had a stroke, so I replaced him in a few classes.

I became principal of Wah Yan Hong Kong until my health deteriorated, I got sick and I left. In 1988 I went to Ricci Hall as a vice warden living with the 120 students we had there. I was 24/7 with them, I knew them very well. In 1992 the superior sent me to Australia, my retina started to detache for the second time, and because I couldn't see well (I eventually lost my right eye sight), on March 25th, 1993 I came back to Wah Yan Kowloon, where everything is on the same floor, so you don’t have to walk up and down the stairs. Since 1987 I have been teaching at the Seminary, mainly New Testament. I also teach Latin in the Diocesesan school, for the people in the choir, and, since I studied aromatherapy, I help to mix the Holy Week oils for the whole diocese.

The Society of Jesus gave me a lot in terms of formation, spirituality and education. Community life is a blessing! The Spiritual Exercises for me are a gift of introspection, spiritual insights, and logic, and in many ways are revolutionary, and the friendship with other Jesuits has always been very important. Sometimes the inspirations are so deep that it is even difficult to put them properly in action. I had the experience of trying to help the poor, based on General Congregation 32: the Service of Faith and the Promotion of Justice. A limitation is that we often talk but we don’t apply it. So a question could be: is it clear that there was more justice after the GC 32? I think that people caring for refugees were clearly implementing the GC 32, like Fr. Mark Raper for example, but what about the rest of the Society of Jesus?

More recently, the question is: is it possible to find four simple methods to implement the Universal Apostolic Preferences?

A risk is that sometimes we are good at producing documents, a lot of documents, but my feeling is that we have documentation more than implementation. This doesn’t mean that we are doing nothing, I just want to express my question as a reflection for our younger generations. Behold and be careful, remember that in our Constitutions is written that we should give more glory to God as we approach death: “As during his whole life, so also and even more at the time of his death, each member of the Society ought to strive earnestly that through him God our Lord may be glorified and served and his neighbors may be edified, at least by the example of his patience and fortitude along with his living faith, hope, and love of the eternal goods which Christ our Lord merited and acquired for us by those altogether incomparable sufferings of his temporal life and death” (Const n. 595) and that the superiors have a duty to make sure that everyone receives the last sacraments, to avoid situations of the past including our founder Ignatius who died without receiving the rite of anointing!

And I see many good things that are happening: despite being slow to incorporate lay collaborators, now we are improving. Look at our team at Xavier House or in our schools.

One more thing I’m proud of is that in our schools (I’m talking about my experience in Hong Kong) we clearly allow the students freedom, which is unique to us. They learn how to think and to live their freedom, which means we believe in them. They appreciate this very much!

As a final note, I remember that in June 1974 I had a retreat with Fr Parisi, in the Philippines. I had a strong feeling of consolation which indicated that I should be ordained. I am grateful to be in this Society of Jesus. Gratitude and amazement arise now that I am 80 years old. I've been in the Society for 60 years!

Fr. Marciano Baptista SJ

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